Stretching out of the silence, through the torpor, the ache, the awe… beginning to move toward the lyrical mind. There has been a enormous gulf that is impossible to fill, there is only one way to explore it… and that is by being present, so once again, here I am.
I am back breathless and more than a little astonished at where life’s journey takes us sometimes. I had an awful situation where the search engine blocker seems to have failed. I was relying on this function to protect my identity and shared a version of my recent tango post on another forum. Someone in my local tango community went looking for, well I am not really sure what they went looking for, and came up with a link to Sublime Surrender which they publicly posted in response to my non-anonymous post. This was on a forum with no moderation on comments. Basically they seem to have thought I had plagiarised but you can’t actually plagiarise yourself now can you? I removed their comment and let them know that the blog was mine and the words were also mine and a discussion went down where they were most curious as to why I did not wish to link these two forums. So I deleted my blog to protect my identity.
I have been feeling very hurt by this whole situation. Mostly because it felt as though this person, an acquaintance with shared interest and I thought friend, was attempting to publicly discredit me. This may have been the case but I am practicing forgiveness in a small town with a small tango population and will do my best to let go of ill feeling but maintain my guard. Lesson learned.
What have I learned? To be more careful and it’s ok to be assertive in response to protecting yourself but it is important to conduct yourself well. I don’t think in this case that my best face was shown so I will be working on mending fences and hold my head high in my tango world. Further; patience, an eye opener for one who thought she was patient (many thanks to my wordpress ‘inspirator’ – inventing a word here conspirator, inspiration you get me and know who you are Sir) but hey, I am a work in progress.
I have also found that I miss this wordpress community and that it is wonderful nourishment for my soul. Many of my new anonymous friends have been very supportive and I am feeling very grateful. I will be reposting many of my older posts and pick up from where I left off…